I had a rather large bought of self-doubt last week. It started as a ‘should i be writing, no-one reads it anyway’ question that quickly spiraled into anxiety about my personal worth, career path and overall future. Jeez, I know right!
Self-doubt, can be a debilitating companion. She has been a friend of mine since I can remember, dropping in every now and then just to make sure that I don’t get too confident or too comfortable. A wicked witch ever waiting in the shadows to pounce on my soft pink under belly. A belly too easily exposed by rejection, an unkind word or in times of uncertainty.
“See! You are not good enough!” she loves to confirm triumphantly, cackling loudly at my turmoil. Relishing the chance to chastise, the verbal punches continue swiftly and unyielding until defeat is accepted and retreat the only option. The barrage of past, present and future inadequacies to much to cope with.
If it makes you happy, do it anyway.
Whether or not it makes sense, whether or not you are sure about it, whether or not you are good at it.@Dorcusthoughts (Instagram)
Like most of us, I have learnt how to handle this unsavory companion but am never really prepared when she arrives. Exercise and sleep are my typical go to’s. Definitely no action until the feelings have past. Sometimes it just takes something small to make a positive difference, a resonating quote on Instagram (like the one above), a random smile from a stranger, a kind word, or a hug from a friend.
So, let’s look up from our phones and laptops today and offer this often harsh world some love. After all you never know what a person hides behind their smile.
Janine (J9) Nijs